If you identify yourself with the following…there’s no shame in it. The point of this post is to write down the lifestyle I’m trying to manifest for myself.
New York Times Game Subscription
Guys. This is frankly the cheapest item you can possibly claim from this list. $1.25/ week isn’t crazy at all. Now framing it as ~$65/year…there’s a difference. I could never be a hater though because I do stay up helping some of my besties solve the pangram. I get the need to have these puzzles as a daily regimen. I’m sure it boosts the brain power used to conquer the day. We must recognize the chokehold this subscription has over the Vanderbilt population though.
Tide Truck Services
As a resident of Scomb, I fear that the laundry room is reminiscent of the battle of 1812. I mean…guys. Is this what our ancestors would want for us? It reeks. It’s a mess. You’re catching somebody yank your laundry out the minute it’s done. If I wanted to fight, I would be attending West Point. FREE ME. If I had the capacity…trust I would subscribe to the tide truck service in a heartbeat.
Being a Regular at Barcelona Wine Bar
I have been a university student in this god forsaken city for four semesters now and I have yet to dine at Barcelona. This reality may come as a shock to many. Now I definitely would indulge in an occasional grub there. But for some of us…occasionally means weekly. And I support that…just leave some leftovers for me. You don’t have the range to finish that $60 paella by yourself.
Being a Regular at Play Dance Bar
Y’all. BE FOR REAL. Listen. Play can be a great time. But when I reminisce on it…paying a $20 entry fee to get your hands crossed with an X is actually crazy. Like let’s stomach that for a minute. Fun time nonetheless — do not get me wrong. But hitting play often is actually expensive and I fear the broadway venues are worth gambling your fake ID (I do not endorse the forgery of personal identification ***) over going to play at the same frequency. It’s true. I’m right. And you know it.
The Quantity of Emails You Receive From Station B
Me being a former employee of Vanderbilt’s beloved mailroom is enough of a class indicator on its own. I KNOW!!! But I think the unsung indicator here is how often I would see certain individuals at the counter as a worker each week. Bestie. I have seen you at each of my three shifts this week. There is no need for you to scan at the counter. I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! And I saw the TV you ordered the instant I clocked in. The rowing machine. The fridge. The electric scooter (derogatory). The groceries. But please: do not stop being the impulsive buyer you are — as long as you let me borrow your new air fryer to reheat the rand cookie I stole earlier.